Navigating the End-of-School Chaos & Summer Planning for Your Kids
Graduation is around the corner. Awards ceremonies are approaching. Summer camp duffels need to be ordered and packed. This time of year is a whirlwind—exciting, overwhelming, and, let’s be honest, frustrating.
As a parent, you’re juggling a million responsibilities, all while managing your children’s own anxieties, frustrations, and excitement—not to mention their resistance to your “gentle” nudging. So, how do you handle it all?
Elementary Schoolers: The (Mostly) Manageable Stage
The little ones, though sometimes challenging, are still directable. You listen to them, guide them, and (hopefully) they follow your lead. But let’s be real—kids are experts at spotting the cracks in your armor. They see your weaknesses and, if given the chance, will pry those cracks wide open to suit their needs. Seal those cracks! (Pardon the home improvement analogy—I’m in the middle of a remodel!)
At this age, you’re the dictator (in the most loving way, of course). When it’s time to pack for camp, make it a fun event:
✔ Give them a checklist.
✔ Set a deadline. ("We’re packing on Saturday!")
✔ Motivate with rewards. ("Once we’re done—POOL PARTY! Cake, ice cream, the works!")
Bribery? Maybe. But it works. More importantly, it turns the task into a shared, positive experience rather than a battle.
Middle Schoolers: The Resistant Tween Years
Middle schoolers are tricky. They’re still under your control (no driver’s license yet!), but their new favorite phrase is: "Don’t tell me what to do!"
For many tweens, fear is the real reason behind resistance—especially when it comes to going away for the summer. Their outward attitude may be:
🚫 “That’s so lame.”
🚫 “It s@#$%ks.”
🚫 “Why are you making me do this?”
But inside, they’re thinking:
😟 “What if I don’t fit in?”
😟 “What if I hate it?”
😟 “What if I’m miserable?”
So, how do you handle it? Give them choices. Let them feel like they have a say—while still making it clear that doing nothing is NOT an option.
🔹 Present 2-3 summer options (camp, a program, an activity).
🔹 Set a firm deadline (e.g., May 21st).
🔹 Let them decide which one—but NOT whether to participate.
Then? Back off. Let them process. There might be excitement, resistance, or even anger. That’s okay. You set the expectation, gave them control within limits, and left them to digest it. That’s a big step forward from the elementary years.
Teenagers: The Ultimate Challenge
High schoolers fall into two categories:
1️⃣ The go-getters—They have big dreams, ambitious plans, and sometimes ideas that are either way beyond your budget or completely unrealistic (but hey, we love their enthusiasm!).
2️⃣ The “let me sleep and leave me alone” teens—They want zero responsibility and argue that they’ve worked hard all year and deserve an entire summer of… nothing.
An idle teen is a dangerous teen (okay, maybe not always, but you get the point). So, the rule is simple:
📅 By May 21st, six weeks of your summer must be planned.
✅ You must either:
-
Get a job
-
Take a class
-
Join a summer program
The remaining six weeks? We’ll figure it out together—some free time, a family vacation, and yes, chores around the house.
For the reluctant teen, this can feel like a nightmare. They don’t want to commit because they’re waiting to see what their friends will do. That’s fine—but they still have to make a choice.
The Secret Weapon: Keep Talking!
Even when it seems like they’re ignoring you, they’re listening. They hear your suggestions, they know what you want, and even if they reject everything at first, they will come around—as long as you keep the conversation going.
✔ Give them three options.
✔ Set a deadline.
✔ If they don’t choose, you choose for them.
Will there be fireworks? Maybe. But they’ll grow from the experience. And years from now, they’ll appreciate the structure, responsibility, and independence they learned—just like my own kids, who are now in their 20s, making their own decisions using the lessons they resisted back then.
Need Help? Let’s Talk!
If you’re struggling with summer plans or need help getting through to your teen, I’m here. I’ve been through it all and can help guide the conversation. Just reach out!